Don’t have a Valentine this year? Join the club. Am I bitter about it like most of the single women of the world are? Not really. I’m used to it (cues sarcastic, but hysterical laughter). This is only like the 80th year in a row that I’ve been in this situation. It’s a cute little holiday, but it’s extremely commercialized as are most holidays America celebrates. We’re a pretty shallow, money hungry, run by corporations type of country if you really think about it. I digress. That was bitterness talking.
I’d love to have a secret admirer and get a little card with candy stuck to it like in 2nd grade, but since I probably won’t, I decided to investigate as to why many of us can’t seem to find the “right” person, thus occasionally leaving us ValentineLESS on Valentine’s Day. A while ago I asked Professional Matchmaker & Life Coach, Paul C. Brunson a few questions about dating and here’s how it went.
Q 1.What is the most common reason people seem to attract the “wrong” people when dating?
A. Because we don’t value what we need over what we want. Also, on many occasions, out of fear, we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings and therefore trap ourselves.
Q 2. In your opinion, what is the biggest “don’t do” on a first date?
A. Talking about your ex.
Q 3. How do you determine when the best time/way is to let your dating partner know you want to go from casual dating to exclusive dating?
A. Directly. We can’t “beat around the bush” with hints and general overtures. If we can’t communicate directly and openly with our partner, we can’t have a long-term relationship with them.
Q 4. For a hopeless romantic who never seems to find the right dating prospects, where would you suggest are the best types of places to go in order to find them?
A. There’s not an exact spot where all the singles congregate. That said, it is important to be proactive and do things differently (that’s the only way we’ll get different results).
Brief and direct, but there ya have it. Hopefully if you’re single for this V-day, the above advice can give you some insight and help you find a new beau. I’m not searching to find love (it is dreadfully tiring), but if love finds me, then so be it!
Happy Valentine’s Day, and don’t be so hard on yourself! Think about it, chocolate will be on sale!!! 😉
~with style & love~